WHEN A BIRD SINGS....

So it was the summer of 2009; my first encounter with a Pimp...not just any pimp, but muthaf"ing Fillmore Slim...and this is how it goes So I am at one of my routine locations...MUA's to be exact, and the place was packed. I'm partaking in an alcoholic beverage. It had probably been my second round, so I was "in the building and feeling myself." I am laughing, talking and enjoying myself, when I start to feel a strong hand grab me by the waist. At that moment I'm so very tickled. I turn around and I have been pulled closed to a gentlemen who was tall, slim and mighty old!!! I mean I just knew he was over 70!! He's wearing a top hat and a brown pin strip suit. Before I could even comment on how aggressive he was in his approach; he bends down and whisper in my ear : "I need to have you." LOL I'm like "huh" Because I am a sometimes overly friendly person...I entertain the conversation. He's like "what do you want bec...

(the red bra is about 4 months prior to the grey bra) So, I haven't done an update on my body in a while. I decided to do one because people have said that I lost weight. As you all know...I go back and forth with the weight question: booty or no booty? LOL Right now, I am feeling very comfortable with the "white girl booty." I suppose as I am getting older, the "booty" isn't as important to me anymore. Anyways, this current body is being maintained by...uhh, sh*t I really don't know.LOL. Well, I am not in the gym these days, but I do bike everyday (only like 20 minutes worth of biking). I think the main thing is my cut back with alcohol. Liquor has a lot of sugar, and I just don't drink as much. It has happen mainly because of a lifestyle change... I don't party as much. Also fast food! I don't go to BK and get the 99cent whopper jr as much these days, ohh...or Church's two piece w/ a jalapeno (lol, don't get it twisted though...

Today, I thank you... Thank you for not calling me...for not helping me prolong this unneeded stress Today, I thank you... Thank you for being selfish...because it helped me to realize all of my worth Today, I thank you... Thank you for not appreciating all of what was me because now I can give myself to someone who does Today, I thank you... Because even your turmoil has allowed for me to smile...so thanks! (special shout out to Keith...because his words really spoke to me)

Kindred souls...are spirits are enhanced as our union begins to tell an untold story; because I swear I knew him before I met him Right now, I write for you...because through chaos and commotion only thoughts of us shows clarity So I question my safety...my mind is at its most stable focused on you But I put my faith in hope and the possibility...that it is possible for our skin to connect as one...because that's simply the only way to know I am completely yours... I work it out on paper...so I can ensure my thoughts clearly reflect these emotions I only think of myself as a bother sometimes because even when we are not united in this physical space...the Earth somehow routes a piece of your soul to me....so I feel always with you I can't fully decide; if this is gravity pulling us together or some master plan of yours unfolding Kindred souls...because although we may deny it; our destines have been predetermined.

I challenge you to make at least ONE lifestyle change to reduce your carbon footprint. Here are some ideas: No more bottled waters (purchase a container that you can use to refill) Thrift store shopping Bring your bags with you shopping Purchase a Hybrid (for you ballers!) Turn off lights not being used (use energy efficient light bulbs)

Following the Oscar Grant case and much debate surrounding President Obama..I felt the need to address: what are YOU doing? So many people are upset with verdict and the sentencing of the Oscar Grant case. As you should be! But just getting mad isn't enough! Going out to the rally in support isn't enough! Calling my phone and asking me what I think, isn't enough! So I pose the questions: What are YOU doing? We as a community (however you want to define that word) must take these emotions into strategics actions. So many people are not satisfied with President Obama? As you should be! Because President Obama didn't get into the White House by himself. If you thought he was going to get into office and change the institution of AMERICA!! Then you thought wrong, and sorry to disappoint. So yelling in class "Obama hasn't done anything" (without any facts as too why you are saying that) isn't enough? Being mad at Fox News for nothing but negative coverage...

[disclaimer: as you can see...I said "unborn" , but actually she hasn't even been conceived!! LOL, so please don't fill my FB and Twitter accts with "are you preggers?" questions. And for those like...*cough* Lijah...who continues to insist that I may not have a daughter, but a son...I say "whatever". Because as you can see...my unborn daughter makes me strong...so even if she only remains a figment of my imagination, she is helpful in my growth] [to my unborn son...I love you just as much and don't think I forgot about you...but its a woman thing! And you'll understand because I only imagine you being one of the most bright, consciously aware men on the planet] Dear Daughter, I woke up at 5:00am this morning. With more than one thing on my mind, but one being you. Just to let you know...omg, girl! you have a lot of pressure on you and you are not even here. First, I wanted to thank you because you inspire me. You inspire me to wan...

She's gorgeous! And how I've missed her musically!!

ASK YOURSELF.... WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE "ME"?

Okay, we all have done it...dialed the wrong number...and the person that picks up, well maybe has a cute voice. So you can just politely say..."ohh sorry, I have the wrong number" and proceed to hang up OR you can engage in conversation to make life interesting. Well if you have read my other blogs in this topic then you know that I like to make life interesting. So this all happened about a year or so ago... I dialed the wrong number and a decent sounding guy answers the phone. I start to engage in conversation with him and he became more intrigued about me. We probably talked on the phone several of times and we decided to finally meet up (sounds like a party line or something..lol). So I was going to meet him outside his house because it was in my neighborhood ironically. I came looking extra fly, well not on purpose but I actually was meeting up with friends to go to dinner that night. So anyways, as I get out the car...I couldn't help but notice that he was ki...

Strive hard to get a Designated Driver... and No TEXTING and Driving

MY COMMUNITY IS A PLACE WHERE THE MOON REFLECTS OUR GLOW MY COMMUNITY IS NOT A PLACE WHERE GRAVITY DOESN'T EXIST BECAUSE GRAVITY IS WHAT HOLDS US ALL TOGETHER MY COMMUNITY IS UNITY MY COMMUNITY IS NOT DISTRUST MY COMMUNITY IS CLOSE TO THE HEAVENS BECAUSE ONLY IN HEAVEN DO WE ALL SPEAK THE SAME LANGUAGE

I will be the first to say that I doubt myself. It is actually something hard to admit. We would like to believe that we have so much faith in ourselves and we believe in our self more than anyone. But I've learned that more people believe in me than I sometimes believe in myself. I am trying to understand why. Since the beginning of grad school (i know, i am only on week three) I have been questioning if this is meant for me. Asking myself "am I suppose to be here?" So I think....I think hard about where I came from, and about my accomplishments so far. So if I was to write it all down..it makes sense on paper that I am here. My rap sheet would say that this stage in my life is inevitable. I suppose I tend to compare myself with others...which is a horrible thing to do? But when you are sitting in a classroom and you feel that everyone is competing it is hard to do so. I believe I wrote something about this before...so maybe I need to revisit it...but the questi...

Everything that totally has me bothered right now.. We won't get to much into detail about finances...but just note that I don't have it! I'm trying to figure out a clever way to get on the Uncle Sam's list to send me a check without having to pop one out!! Life...OMG!! Grad School is about to start and thats totally frightening!! Love...that shit just stinks! Seems like every time I give myself completely to someone..i am just hurt! Is it meant for me? Because i am ready to give up on this sh*t. I try to put myself in my daughters shoes. even though she doesnt exist yet (so for the future, i am sorry my love for putting so much pressure on you before you are even here) But i ask myself...would i want my daughter to be dealing with this? Is it possible that there are some people on this earth who is just not meant to give love? I am having a hard time believing that...but hey! we are all not built the same I am really trying, and it seems as if i just continue to fail ...

If I wanna go...would you come leave far away from here...where no one knows us; and the energy of the earth just allows us to be If I wanna go..would you come? Fly to a place...where the moon is brighter than the sun; but our glow is what guides us If I wanna go...would you come? Land at a place where only love and peace is allowed...but our fire sometimes spark controversy Wherever I go...I just want you there...so this is only a clever way of asking...Do you mind taking place of my shadow?

LOL!! Have you ever flipped through a men's underwear catalog? Well...try it, you may get slightly aroused!! lol I'm Just Sayin'

Yo!! One of my new favorite artist...check her out

Yo!! Whats up with this? Why are all religious leaders male: Jesus, Buddha (the well known one), Muhammad, Hindu Leader What I don't understand is why do males have so much power? I mean...even God is referred to as "him." I find this to be very odd... First of all...WOMEN CAN CREATE LIFE WITH OUT YOU ALL!! (well all we have to do is milk you all for sperm...and we all know its not hard to do that, lol)

I know its hot outside...wearing less: OHH I am all about that!! But please let your skin BREATHE!! Wearing clothes that does not cling to your skin is so much more attractive then the tight, cutting off your booty shorts!!

This is the life long question: why do good girls date bad guys? [Random: I was in the line for traffic court and there was a very "colorful"woman standing in front of me. Colorful meaning she was loud and obnoxious. lol But anyways, she made a valid point: "Why our baby daddy's are no good, but are man is"] Anyways, I don't have a baby daddy (and I hope not to never refer to the father of my children as such) but i understand her point. I know I have definitely fallen for the rough on the edges kind. Someone who if I was to write down our behavioral characteristics they just wouldn't align. Possessive Selfish Cocky Hood (in one way or another) So why do we feel the need to filter through the bad ones, and even some of us decide to have our children with them. Then when the good one comes along..we kind of don't know how to respond. It is as if we do not feel deserving. So why don't we? Some level of insecurity there. Speaking for myself. ...

BE TRUE TO YOURSELF!! YOU CAN'T GET FAR LYING TO YOURSELF ABOUT WHO YOU ARE!! BETTER TO FACE THE "MAN IN THE MIRROR" THAN TO RUN AWAY FROM IT!!

Okay, so its not what you think…or maybe it is…but not really..lol Okay, so I was at the usual reggae spot in Sacramento. I happen to go on a day where they were showcasing underground rap artist. One guy happened to stand out. Following his performance, I walked up too him..show him the normal love that I show people. He had given me his name…then it sounded so familiar.. So maybe it was like 3 weeks prior..I was reading an urban magazine about local artist. And it was the same name ..we’ll call him Neo. So Neo was in this article, and now I had meet him in person.. (back to the club) I had asked had he recently been featured and he told me. I found that to be so ironic. He explained that he was..then invited me to hang with him at his hotel. So I told my homegirl that I was going to go after we had left. She was totally against it, but I thought it was fate (LOL). So I went…we was there alone..we talked for hours about music, art, Locs, Ea...

Well scientifically YES!! Because it is composed of cells, plasmas, and a bunch of other scientific jargon!! LOL..But spiritually? Uhh, I beg to differ…now I know this blog may upset a few people..But guess what!! I DON’T CARE!! Its my blog…if you disagree comment and/or create your own!! Lol So Family…yeah we are born into family. I just started to question this belief “blood is thicker than water”, and this comes out of a few recent confrontations that I have had myself with family. I had to take a step back and dissect this statement. Okay, so family…we are born into. We have no choice of who are mom, sister, cousin, aunt…that is all decided for us at birth. Friends are based on selection…we choose who are friends are. We typically have people around who are reflections of ourselves. They may not be entirely like us, but they do have a trait that we find in common. Because we have blood relation…does that automatically make us “friend compatible”. ...

I am sitting here watching the "Hope for Haiti Now." And I just don't understand what the heck is going on? My first question is: "Where is the Dominican Rrepublic" in all this? So why have they not gotten enough supplies there? It only make sense to me for them to move the people; maybe on ships and try to save others. Why am I seeing people on the TV begging for food? And now I am sitting here watching Entertainers who are making 13 million a MOVIE asking me to donate $10!! Don't get me wrong!! I definitely think we should all do are part because for sure people have to care about other people (especially Black people; just my belief). But how about all these people who gross more than $400 million a year. Why don't they all drop a few maybe ten million. Can't this get Haiti out of this mess? It seems like its just a bunch of people dying out there; not getting the support thats needed. We are all smart people; and I am sure that we have pla...

The Definition of Rose Colors...(who knew?) Red Love, Beauty, Courage and Respect, Romantic Love, Congratulations, "I Love You", "Job Well Done", Sincere Love, Respect, Courage & Passion Red (Dark) Unconscious beauty Red (Single) "I Love You" Deep Burgundy Unconscious Beauty White Purity, Innocence, Silence, Secrecy, Reverence, Humility, Youthfulness, "I am worthy of you", Heavenly White (Bridal) Happy love Pink Appreciation, "Thank you", Grace, Perfect Happiness, Admiration, Gentleness, "Please Believe Me" Dark Pink Appreciation, Gratitude, "Thank You" Light Pink Admiration, Sympathy, Gentleness, Grace,...

So one summer...I met a guy..we'll call him Maximus (why? because I love Ancient Greek names..lol) So I was hanging out with some friends of mines; doing the normal bar hopping. My guy friend had told me and my homegirl that he had to meet up with some friends. So we met the friends, and I happen to have met one before (and he had to make known that we had a "session" together in the car; while driving in Oakland). The other guy, Maximus, i was immediately attracted too. He fit my typical "OMG! I think I'm in love" look...brown skin, tall, scruffy beard and locs!! But honestly..I didn't have plans to like get with him..i just thought he was cute. So that night.. we all went to a building in downtown Oakland. He had keys. We went to the rooftop and all enjoyed getting out of our bodies. During this..me and Maximus did a lot of talking to each other.. he made me laugh, like a lot...so I enjoyed that..he left me with a nice feeling Following that da...