WHEN A BIRD SINGS....

One my ongoing self exploration journey,lol, I have longed for something to connect with. I have always thought there had to be more. Not feeling as if this place we called America really belonged to me. Not feeling like it is my rightful place. Not feeling like my culture is deep enough. After traveling out of the country 5 times in 2 years (crazy! I know, I am sitting my a** down lol). I have found a new sense of pride in what it means to be American.  I know I would see the American flag and not know whether or not I can identify with it. Looking at America as it being the White man's country. Not being appreciative for all the blood and sweat that my elders put in building this country. I had for a long time envied my friends that were from other countries. How they can wear their colors proudly. How they can come together and enjoy their homeland food. It all clicked when I was in Togo. Like wait? We have all that in America.  I am proud to be American. I am even ...

So, its officially been 6 months that I have lived on the east coast.  Wow! How time flies.  I made a very brave, daring, risky decision late last year to quite my job, pack of my things, and head to the DMV.  My only plan was: growth! They say if you want something different to happen in your life, then you must do something different.  I was looking to grow both personally and professionally.  Back home in Oakland...for the record, I love Oakland! And there is not a better city than Oakland, Ca.  But, I was not growing at home. I had become stagnant. I had become frustrated with my stagnation.  I was angry going into work.  I was tired of doing the same old things.  I wasn't as involved with my community as I would have like to be.  I was not truly happy. So I moved to the DMV.  Since I have been here, I experienced a lot of different emotions. Happiness, joy, frustration, loneliness, stressed, excited, eager...and a bunch of ot...

What does it mean to have a trip of a lifetime? Well, I suppose my visit to Bangkok, Thailand would describe such a trip.  I am still in disbelief that the little brown girl from West Oakland made her way all the way across the world.  I've been dreaming of Thailand since my days of training in Muay Thai at Cheetah Muay Thai Academy.  I can't say for sure what drew me into the culture.  However, I do know that at the time, my gym was an extension of my family.  First of all, I truly enjoyed training. And secondly, my trainer was just the best.  He was definitely like a big brother to me.  He took my goofy, clumsy self in and turned the skinny girl into a fighter!  Since those days, I had long to visit Thailand.  And this year (well technically last year) it happened!  I said at the beginning of 2015 I would bring in the new year in Thailand, and that's just what I did. Bangkok, Thailand. Huge metropolitan city.  So much going on. ...

I just want to take a moment and thank the creator for the Black man.  Thank you for bringing such beauty, strength, will power, body, determination into our lives. (I almost used a stock photo for this post, but then I thought..wait, I have hella beautiful a** Black men around me...miss these guys  *insert emoji kisses* )

I live in a country where we acknowledge Bruce/Caitlyn Jenner as woman of the year, Charlie Sheen announces HIV status on TV,  Rachel Dolezal makes national news for pretending to be Black,  and Beyonce makes a commercial to play during the super bowl to announce that she's vegan. LIKE, WTF! I'm just saying.  I need to do a better job at really eliminating this pop culture sh*t. Because I do have a choice.  And I have been falling in line, I must admit. But, man...I just can't take this sh*t no mo'. LOL (shoutout to my inability to spell out profanity, lol, I just feel tacky doing so. And if you ever see me do, sh*t just got real. LOL)

I was asked to be the guest speaker for the Program Ceremony at Next Step Learning Center.  It is an organization dedicated to helping adults receive their High School Diploma Equivalency.  The ceremony was to honor those adults who had received their Equivalency and also those who were inducted into the National Adult Education Honor Society. I was humbled by the opportunity.

People always have something negative to say about Oakland and especially Oakland public schools.  Although they are right in some ways, but they are also very wrong in other ways.  When I hear, "Oakland don't do nothing for their students"....its hella irritating.  Well first because I work for Oakland Unified, and I know that I am working really hard for my teachers.  So its just disrespectful to all of the hard working people that are working at the schools to transform student lives. And one way that is happening, that's been happening, has been through our career themed academies.  We call it Linked Learning.  Career themed academies provides a holistic approach to learning. Where teachers are working in teams, all subject areas are focused on a particular career industry, students are apart of a small learning community, students get extra support, students participate in career related experiences.   So me and 3 other women, Courtne...

"Can I come thru?" I swear this line has haunted me all of 2014! And if another Negro says this to me again! "Can I come thru?" Like how old am I? Ohh, last time I checked...I was touching 30 with a yard stick!  In 2014, I am coming to the understanding that its no longer cool to take ladies out.  Like you meet a guy, you all have a few conversations, and then he says "Can I come thru?" Like, wtf!  So I can say that I am guilty on accepting this.  This "coming thru"tactic.  Well predominantly because I didn't see much about the guy that I truly wanted....maybe I just wanted something physical from him...so "coming thru" was okay.  But then what? Like its only so much "coming thru" that's keeping me entertained. I have been one of the women feeding into this hoax set up my men,  Wanting to convince us that they are giving us some of their time, so what do we need to complain about.  But then what else are you do...

A wise man once told me that "hurt people, hurt people"! I swear, it made sense to me in that moment.  Then I had to sit back and evaluate how I was handling the hurt that someone was causing me. I think this is something that we all think about in that moment.  Well some of us think longer than others.  I think that "hurt people, hurt" because they react! They react rather quickly, and typically their reaction is driven by the hurt.  In the most immediate moment, all you want to do is to make the other person feel that same pain. Wow, how disgusting when you really think about it.  How does it help for us to inflict pain? I'm saying, it doesnt remove the pain or hurt you feel. I know I struggle with this a lot because like the next human being I hate to wallow in my sorrow alone.  But what helps is to really take a moment to pause before reacting.  I discuss it with myself.  Ask myself do I wanna take myself out of character.  Becaus...

Following the Oscar Grant case and much debate surrounding President Obama..I felt the need to address: what are YOU doing? So many people are upset with verdict and the sentencing of the Oscar Grant case. As you should be! But just getting mad isn't enough! Going out to the rally in support isn't enough! Calling my phone and asking me what I think, isn't enough! So I pose the questions: What are YOU doing? We as a community (however you want to define that word) must take these emotions into strategics actions. So many people are not satisfied with President Obama? As you should be! Because President Obama didn't get into the White House by himself. If you thought he was going to get into office and change the institution of AMERICA!! Then you thought wrong, and sorry to disappoint. So yelling in class "Obama hasn't done anything" (without any facts as too why you are saying that) isn't enough? Being mad at Fox News for nothing but negative coverage...

ASK YOURSELF.... WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE "ME"?

LOL!! Have you ever flipped through a men's underwear catalog? Well...try it, you may get slightly aroused!! lol I'm Just Sayin'

Yo!! Whats up with this? Why are all religious leaders male: Jesus, Buddha (the well known one), Muhammad, Hindu Leader What I don't understand is why do males have so much power? I mean...even God is referred to as "him." I find this to be very odd... First of all...WOMEN CAN CREATE LIFE WITH OUT YOU ALL!! (well all we have to do is milk you all for sperm...and we all know its not hard to do that, lol)

Well scientifically YES!! Because it is composed of cells, plasmas, and a bunch of other scientific jargon!! LOL..But spiritually? Uhh, I beg to differ…now I know this blog may upset a few people..But guess what!! I DON’T CARE!! Its my blog…if you disagree comment and/or create your own!! Lol So Family…yeah we are born into family. I just started to question this belief “blood is thicker than water”, and this comes out of a few recent confrontations that I have had myself with family. I had to take a step back and dissect this statement. Okay, so family…we are born into. We have no choice of who are mom, sister, cousin, aunt…that is all decided for us at birth. Friends are based on selection…we choose who are friends are. We typically have people around who are reflections of ourselves. They may not be entirely like us, but they do have a trait that we find in common. Because we have blood relation…does that automatically make us “friend compatible”. ...

I go back and forth every morning as to whether or not I will put on make-up. (honestly I only wear brow pencil, mascara and eyeliner) I hate to put it on...it takes up my time and I have to be precise. But once its on...I love it... However, I refuse to wear make-up everyday because I don't want to condition myself to a face that really isnt mines. I don't want to look in the mirror and only feel pretty after "I've put my face on". My advice..."LOVE THE FACE, BEHIND THE FACE" I'm Just Saying

Good Morning...this is totally not normal for me to try and rush a blog at 6:00am in the morning before work. But ironically I woke up with "head" on my mind...lol (hmm...interesting) I've been going back and forth with reasons why the Black women can be so, umm, for the lack of a better word "constrained" when it comes to sexuality. I am not going to discuss all of it because I wouldn't be able to finish this. I am really talking about "oral sex." It would seem that the stigma of "giving head" would not be so intense...but I feel as if it still is... On the contrary, I have started to see more black guys talk about giving head on twitter and other outlets. But as a black female it still appears that "giving head" is a taboo thing or one of those things that you wouldn't tell your homegirl the next day. I was at a club recently and Too Short was performing. He made a statement on stage "All you hoes can be on your...

NID-HCA Offices Someone said to me…”you cannot lash out on me based on your previous experiences”..Initially this statement always makes sense. Until I thought long about it… (I am totally swamped at work; however, I cannot function with an uneasy mind set…so I had to take 10 minutes to get this off my chest) How do we form conclusions about certain experiences in life without having a personal experience with it? Let’s say for example…when people say, I don’t like sushi. I’m like...”Have you tried it” and they are like “No”…well how do you know that you don’t like it. So, from our experiences we develop an understanding of the things that we like and the things that we don’t like. From our experiences, we learn how we like to be treated and how we don’t like to be treated. So just because one is not saying that “well in the past…this happens…so this is why I am like this” that does not mean that there wasn’t a certain experience that helped them get that way. C...

So, there has been a couple of incidents that has occurred either to me or others around me that I chose to address. This may hit home for some folks also... When a person decides to step out of the relationship, you know, cheat on their spouse. Now...their partner finds out that they are cheating. Okay..now who are you more concerned about..the cheating spouse or the other "person".. I am not sure why a lot of people focus their frustration with the other "person"..well actually, I do have a theory. I believe that it is easy for us to take our frustration out on the person who are feelings are not attached with. Its harder to face the person who really hurt you. From the looks of it..it seems that females are quick to be more upset with the other woman than their man. Most girls reasoning would be "she should have respect that that's my man" or " woman to woman she knows thats wrong". Well I have a couple of problems with this... #1 M...

I'm not perfect, and we all know that I don't try to be. However, when it comes to my place of employment...I always strive to do my best. I like being a good worker, and having an awesome rapport with my supervisor. This is the first job that I've had to take direction...wait for a task, complete it, hand it in, get comments, revise, and blah blah blah. Now, I know I'm not in grade school...so I'm not asking for a gold star or anything. But I am human!! And minimal encouragers are great!! I cannot take just "RED INK" and "DID YOU DO THIS? DID YOU DO THAT?" all day!! It wears down on my confidence and my work doesn't get better it stays stagnate. I just want reassurance that my effort is furthering along the company's agenda... is it too much to ask? "I'm Just Sayin'"