WHEN A BIRD SINGS....

Yes, so it is a new year. A chance to start the year of with a new start, with a new state of mind,  with new in tentions. I have to have a better year than last year, I just have too. Last year, yes, there was some beautiful moments, but when I think it through, geez it was pretty rough. I only worked for half of the year. And in that half of the year, I was super stressed. I was so depressed. And I was having a hard time finding help. Real help. I was in a very low place, but I was making money. I realized more and more that money does not rule me. And yes, sometimes money can make life easier, but it doesn't when it comes to stress. It can make life really feel like sh*t. I felt very alone also. Because most people just didn't understand what I was going through. Most people cannot understand someone else's level of stress. Because we all handle and process our problems very differently. So what may seem small to you, can be explosive to me and vice versa. For a long ...

So I finally made it. Awaited so long to go to Africa. Sh*t, anywhere in Africa. But, West Africa in particular. Why? Supposedly because of the Transatlantic Slave Trade. The dark history of what brought enslaved Africans to the Americas. The need to feel a connection to a long, lost, homeland. Being able to see with my own eyes what some of the countries are like. Well, instead of taking a trip to the beach this year for my birthday, I decided to go to Togo.  Here in Maryland, my closest thing to a family are a group of people from Togo. Before moving to the area, I had not known anyone from the country before. But spending most of my weekends with these guys, I have learned some things about the culture, food, music and language. One of them was traveling back home this month, so I decided to tag along. At first, I thought I would base my decision on what country to visit on my DNA results. I had that done a few months ago and the results came back saying that my bloodline was ...

So this picture doesn't quite reflect my current state of mind, but use your imagination and picture 10 other bees surrounding that butterfly. LOL. A butterfly among bees. When I think of this, I think of the individual butterfly. Flying around, pollinating, spreading love and beauty, nourishing plants, and bringing smiles to those that see it fly by. Then there are the bees. Pretty much doing the same thing, but BUZZING! Moving really quickly from plant to plant to pollinate. They are very intentional, they are on a mission, and then reporting back to the queen bee. Very much a hierarchy to their madness.  My current state of mind. Since I have moved from Oakland to DC, I have definitely struggled with finding my place. With connecting to the community. And most importantly, finding my place in the world of work. Its different here (as with most places that are not home). But, its like really different here. The pace of work (everyone just BUZZING around lol), how people speak...

Exercise Meditation Good Food ....then repeat 😊😊

Yes, overall I am a pretty positive person. One of the young homie's put it best "Raven, you have such a happy disposition." Yes, this is true. My outward facing is positive, easy going, free spirited human being. However, I battle low moments also. Feeling not confident. Feeling inferior. Feelings of confusion. Feelings of negativity. Feeling like, "why must I live this type of life?" And what I am learning more and more, that is also me. Because even happy people get sad... This is something I cannot run from. Life throws us all kinds of twist and turns. Put us in situations that pushes our thinking of what we have imagined ourselves to be, And sometimes, when these moments occur, we are not sure how to react. And for me, a lot of times, I can easily just shut down. When I shut down, it is very hard to function. Very hard to be productive. And even more hard to remain positive.  When I have these moments, the logical person knows what it is that I have ...