WHEN A BIRD SINGS....

OMG! Something pretty unbelievable has happened.....I am pregnant! It is like a whirlwind of emotions. But I am excited to finally let people know. The longest 12 weeks ever! What a way to get me back blogging more regularly. I would love to share my experience, not only for public consumption, but mostly for the baby to view one day (after learning how to read at a very early age of course ;). Also, it will be good for me, so that I can remember, cherish and reflect on the journey. Sooooo......the first 12 weeks! How did I find out? Well, let's just say this...it was no accident. My boyfriend and I had decided that we would start to try. So, I got rid of my last packs of birth control pills, downloaded an app called "Flo" which tracks your ovulation and ordered an ovulation kit (March 2018). Well, we never got to use the ovulation kit because the app worked pretty well. I was a bit nervous about this "getting pregnant" situation because since I have been ...

Yes, so it is a new year. A chance to start the year of with a new start, with a new state of mind,  with new in tentions. I have to have a better year than last year, I just have too. Last year, yes, there was some beautiful moments, but when I think it through, geez it was pretty rough. I only worked for half of the year. And in that half of the year, I was super stressed. I was so depressed. And I was having a hard time finding help. Real help. I was in a very low place, but I was making money. I realized more and more that money does not rule me. And yes, sometimes money can make life easier, but it doesn't when it comes to stress. It can make life really feel like sh*t. I felt very alone also. Because most people just didn't understand what I was going through. Most people cannot understand someone else's level of stress. Because we all handle and process our problems very differently. So what may seem small to you, can be explosive to me and vice versa. For a long ...

Yep! So I tried it, ya know...one of those internet fitness craze. Its called Resultsin28days.com. The reason I tried it was because 1st: it was super cheap (about $40), 2nd: I was convinced with the routine, it looked simple enough and the food regiment was something that I was used to when I am on my conscious eating hype, 3rd: I looked at the before and after pics, and they looked believable. I know I needed something. My body was getting out of control. I just hated how I was looking and feeling in my clothes. Most important, I was become less and less comfortable with myself. I had a conversation with a girlfriend about us both feeling the need to get rid of our half-shirts. Knowing, it's one of my favorite clothing items. So, I said...forget that! I am getting back in control of this body of mines. Okay, the Exercises. So the exercises are fairly simple; however, I can see how it can be challenging for people who have never done any working out or may have more weight on ...

One thing that I have been struggling with lately has been friendships. Friendships. Seems as you start to get older, you start to drift apart from friends. Also, as you get older, it becomes difficult to make new friends.  Now that I have lived in Maryland for 2 years, it has been difficult coming to terms with the distance that I am away from friends (and family) back home. However, I think I believed I had a different expectation of how our friendships may evolve due to the distance. Yes, we are no longer in the same physical area, but that wouldn't caused a wedge in our union. (I now beg to differ). I do not hear much from my friends back home. Hell, I haven't had anyone visit either. Maybe a casual group text or a #shoutout here and there, but not the way I would like. I do not have social media, so I do not have that instant gratification of knowing what your friends are up too. BUT, I know I do what I can. I call, I text, I Marco Polo (a more intimate social media pl...

Just wanted to share the cutest little walking thing on earth...

Like, I need to get my sh*t together. I have been waking up the past few months and looking at myself in the mirror and really unhappy with what I see. What I do know, is that I have the discipline to do what needs to be done. However, I am tired of it going in waves. Like I go through these phases. A lot of this has to do with stress and depression. It will really kill you. I recently turned 32. Like, when did that happen though. I swear time be moving. You better move with it or you will get left. I know right now my body and my mind looks and feel sad. And, I really want to have a better hold over both. I need to take the reins back on my health. I need to do what is right for Raven. I am getting no younger. And, I know I want to be in the best health before I start popping out little Raven's lol. OMG! Like, I am seriously in baby-making age. LOL, thats pretty scary, I cannot lie. But I gotta have my body and mind right. Sometimes we get so focused on the body, and we forget the...

One my ongoing self exploration journey,lol, I have longed for something to connect with. I have always thought there had to be more. Not feeling as if this place we called America really belonged to me. Not feeling like it is my rightful place. Not feeling like my culture is deep enough. After traveling out of the country 5 times in 2 years (crazy! I know, I am sitting my a** down lol). I have found a new sense of pride in what it means to be American.  I know I would see the American flag and not know whether or not I can identify with it. Looking at America as it being the White man's country. Not being appreciative for all the blood and sweat that my elders put in building this country. I had for a long time envied my friends that were from other countries. How they can wear their colors proudly. How they can come together and enjoy their homeland food. It all clicked when I was in Togo. Like wait? We have all that in America.  I am proud to be American. I am even ...