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Boy Crazy

Yea, I know...im a big flirt!! I get it all the time. I remember back in high school when a teacher called my mom in for a parent and teacher conference (who would have known? a 4.0 student needing parent/teacher conferences....thats because the teacher was a hater...she was the one who halted my 4.o for a whole year because she just refused to give me higher than a C...isn't that just f*cked up!! Like whats her beef with me....How am I getting A's in all the rest of my classes and only one C....just doesn't make any sense...well after that parent/teacher conference...and my mom checkin' her....she gave me a B....as you can see I'm still a little bitter...let me get back on topic). One of her complaints (on top of the fact that I spoke my mind and I refused to let a teacher just sit on her ass) was that I flirt to much with the boys.

It wasn't always this way. In elementary I was a bit quiet and skinny (until I had Larry). Then going into junior high school I started to develop; however, I wasn't the most girly girl. I always wore my clothes to big. I loved Khakis, Old Navy Windbreakers and Peacoats, and nice tennis shoes. Growing up I was a bit self conscious about my dark skin (never really had a problem with my hair) I never thought of myself as one of the pretty girls, but I never thought I was ugly. I guess I thought maybe it had something to do with how I dressed, how strict my mom was, being a smart girl...I just didn't think a lot of guys liked me. I noticed that I really got guys attention when I would come out of my tomboy attire at school. Thats when guys started to noticed how much I had actually developed. But I wasn't always comfortable with the attention. However, I remember when all of this changed....

One day I was leaving school...I just so happened to be walking with...Umm, lets call him Jason. So Jason and I was walking to "Da Bottoms" together. Now, Jason was pretty well known around the hood, he was such a bad ass...back and forth to juve all the time...(FYI I have always been really square however I hung around all kinds of people) anyways, so we are walking home and Jason is just throwing all kinds of compliments at me. It was making me very bashful. Then he pulled me gently by my fingers and told me he had to tell me something. I stopped because by now, I'm like melting....FYI I think I forgot to mention that Jason was a CUTIE PIE!! Anyways so he pulled my body close to him (This was the first time I got slightly aroused by a boy's body being close to mines) He leaned in and kissed me on my neck (from then on....my neck has always been my spot!! LOL)

I really do thank Jason for that walk home that day because it really helped me to think about myself holistically. I started to understand that it was important for me to LOVE everything about me. From then on....I have been boy crazy...

Comments

  1. I was self conscious about having darker skin. I think I actually hated it in elementary, and was like whatever in middle schol. But in high school I accepted it as being part of me, and by college I was loving it. I saw it as getting an extra kiss from the sun (i'm always romanticizing something!). I think UCD is when I realized everybody likes dark meat. lol.

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