A butterfly among bees

So this picture doesn't quite reflect my current state of mind, but use your imagination and picture 10 other bees surrounding that butterfly. LOL. A butterfly among bees. When I think of this, I think of the individual butterfly. Flying around, pollinating, spreading love and beauty, nourishing plants, and bringing smiles to those that see it fly by. Then there are the bees. Pretty much doing the same thing, but BUZZING! Moving really quickly from plant to plant to pollinate. They are very intentional, they are on a mission, and then reporting back to the queen bee. Very much a hierarchy to their madness. 

My current state of mind. Since I have moved from Oakland to DC, I have definitely struggled with finding my place. With connecting to the community. And most importantly, finding my place in the world of work. Its different here (as with most places that are not home). But, its like really different here. The pace of work (everyone just BUZZING around lol), how people speak and treat each other, how we work to help community. And let me be clear, I have been very much embedded in community and politics. Those things intersect in a real way here. And yes, I am very much a community centered person. The politics side of it, yea, not really my thing. But I am in Washington DC. You cannot escape it. It is every where. I come from a place where we value very much making change from the bottom up. I am from the land of Huey P. Newton and the Black Panther Party. I am from a city that prides it self on making noise and pushing systems to respond to their needs. On the flip, in DC, I have been feeling like I need to schmooze and play this game, in order to get work done. When really, I am just trying to uplift the power in people. 

Another thing about this place, is the value of status. Everybody wants to be somebody. Got dammit, I am somebody, and I don't aspire to be anyone other than myself. And I thought that would be appreciated. Individuality. Embracing all types of thinkers, creators, workers. It brings diversity of thought and execution. But, I have been feeling like as if I was being molded to become a BEE. Clipping my wings. Making them shorter and snappy-er. LOL. Yes, that's like nearly impossible. 

I am not out here trying to prove my being to anyone else, besides my community. And when I say prove myself to my community, the only thing I want to prove is that I can be a part of the change that I want to see. And I do not need to be applauded for that. I do not need to be given an award for that. 

I have done something that can be hands down one of my most brave moves today. I chose Raven. I chose health. I chose principles. I chose my sanity. I chose my well-being. I quit my job. Yes, I quit my job and I currently am very uncertain what my next moves are. However, I had to do what was right for myself. 

Life is too short. Too short to be stressed. Too short not to feel valued. Too short not to recognize the beauty that you bring to the world. Too short not to be brave. 

This butterfly will find her home.