Really, the title of this blog is just to remind myself not to do the above! I am still working through a pretty big heartbreak and is difficult. For the most part, I.....ummm... kind of okay. But there are some days that I get really bummed out about it. It is really hard to go from having someone to having no one. Especially when that someone was like your everything. That someone became your family, brother, best friend and lover. Then all of a sudden....its all gone. It's very hard to cope with that reality. And being out of it, I can see why people would want to stay. Its comfortable! You get used to that way of life! Couldn't stand the fact of being alone!
How am I coping? Staying close to friends and family. Loved ones. Surrounding myself with people who love me unconditionally. Surrounding myself with genuine people. Appreciating the love and affection from my Reese's Cup. Trying to focus on Raven. On self improvement. Continuing being the best person that I can be!
It gets hard though. Especially in the world of social networking. When you have to see all these people around you appearing to be happily involved (I only use the word "appearing", not to be cynical, but being real. We only post the positive on social networks, for the most part. We don't air our dirty laundry). I'm saying, I have folks my age who are getting married or have been married for a couple of years. I'm saying, I have folks my age with children. Beautiful children.
I recall experiencing this feeling of hurt before. And my first reaction was: GO BOY CRAZY!! I suppose that's what you do when you're in your early twenties to help ease the pain. However, that's no longer my solution. I really want it all! I want a partner in life. I want a strong foundation. I want to build with someone. I want someone to hold me down. I want someone who is solid. I want someone who is real. I want someone who is committed. I want someone who genuinely cares about me. I want to have beautiful children. And I want to be all that to someone else. Right now, it seems so out of my reach; especially when I thought I had that. But, I continue to put my faith in the universe. Because I know in due time, and if I continue to put good energy in this world, all these things will come true.
How am I coping? Staying close to friends and family. Loved ones. Surrounding myself with people who love me unconditionally. Surrounding myself with genuine people. Appreciating the love and affection from my Reese's Cup. Trying to focus on Raven. On self improvement. Continuing being the best person that I can be!
It gets hard though. Especially in the world of social networking. When you have to see all these people around you appearing to be happily involved (I only use the word "appearing", not to be cynical, but being real. We only post the positive on social networks, for the most part. We don't air our dirty laundry). I'm saying, I have folks my age who are getting married or have been married for a couple of years. I'm saying, I have folks my age with children. Beautiful children.
I recall experiencing this feeling of hurt before. And my first reaction was: GO BOY CRAZY!! I suppose that's what you do when you're in your early twenties to help ease the pain. However, that's no longer my solution. I really want it all! I want a partner in life. I want a strong foundation. I want to build with someone. I want someone to hold me down. I want someone who is solid. I want someone who is real. I want someone who is committed. I want someone who genuinely cares about me. I want to have beautiful children. And I want to be all that to someone else. Right now, it seems so out of my reach; especially when I thought I had that. But, I continue to put my faith in the universe. Because I know in due time, and if I continue to put good energy in this world, all these things will come true.
Comments
Post a Comment